Dentistry

29 06 2007

You can pretty much ignore this entry if you want. Excuse me while I rant about going to the dentist. Today I took the day off and that’s one of the things I did….

So I switched around my work schedule and was able to go to a long-planned dental appointment and in general get my relaxation on. And when I say long-planned, I mean long-planned. I must have made this appointment in January or something. But you know, going to the dentist is not one of my favorite things to do, and I’m guessing that you, unseen reader, feel the same way.

It seems like invariably a dentist sees my two intact, unopposed, relatively healthy wisdom teeth (the lower two never came in) and salivates at the thought of removing them. Why, it’s a hygiene issue. And of course, the hygiene is never good enough. (I like to munch on sweets and I only brush my teeth once a day, which ought to be plenty in my book, but apparently it’s not.) And I really haven’t had issues with my two unopposed third molars on the upper part of my mouth, so why get them out? On the other hand I have a hard time keeping them clean…

[DAYDREAMING SEQUENCE COMMENCES … Elevator music plays softly in the background] I can’t help but think of the dentist scenes in Little Shop of Horrors. By the way, one of the best musicals ever made… but what ever happened to Rick Moranis? Suddenly I feel an urge to watch Honey, I Shrunk the Kid. I loved that movie, that and Back to the Future(s), when I was little. [FADE OUT FROM DAYDREAM SEQUENCE]

So that’s a decision that remains. The thing I hate about going to the dentist is I feel so vulnerable with my mouth all open like that and someone sticking sharp, often vibrating tools in it. It’s such a humbling experience. I did have “subgingival calculus” going on. I like math and I enjoyed my brief encounters with basic and integral calculus in high school and college, so it’s hard for me to imagine what’s wrong with that. So, I have mathematically inclined teeth. Jealousy perhaps? But alas, this necessitated numbing up my gums and sticking a prod in there to loudly scrape all sorts of Tooth Goblins out of there for about a half an hour. In October, I’ll go back to have a “finescaling,” which is… I’m not sure, but I think they go in there with some kind of vibrating tool or something. I dunno. Fun stuff! And I don’t even want to think about getting my wisdom teeth extracted… I’m not yet sure if it’s worth it, but if I do it, it’s probably better to do it while I’m in my mid-20s rather than wait, if I’m sure that problems will result. But that’s the thing; my last dentist thought my teeth would be fine…

Also: I thought it was amusing that they were playing some boring classical shite in there and then the dude comes in and goes, “What is this? A funeral dirge?”

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